


Becoming Human

by Gemology



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Domestic, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Amputee Peridot (Steven Universe), Domestic Fluff, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Lapis Lazuli/Peridot (Steven Universe), Eventual Relationships, F/F, Female Friendship, Fluff, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Homeworld (Steven Universe), Love, Shipping, Steven Universe AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-14
Updated: 2017-01-06
Packaged: 2018-05-01 13:28:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5207555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gemology/pseuds/Gemology
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lapis and Peridot struggle to get along in their new life together. Stranded on an alien planet, they'll learn about each others past lives, and what it means to be human. Earth isn't quite home, but at least they have each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Home

Off on a lone beach, at a place where humans had never been, there sat a homely beach house. It was an odd contrast to the wild jungle that lay all around it, but there it was. It was the picture of serenity. No humans, no cars, no streetlights- nothing but uncharted jungle covering the landscape, and an ocean surrounding the haven.

On the porch stood two figures, both looking out across the empty and perfectly peaceful beach. It would have been clear to anyone approaching that the two were not human. But there would be no visitors. Not of the human variety, anyway. The pair were completely secluded, shut off from the world and free to live as they pleased.

"Peri, don't look so glum! It's nice here." Lapis took a deep breath, letting the scent of the ocean fill her nostrils.

"Who cares? I'm not staying long. And  _don't_  call me Peri." The green gem shot back. She grimaced out at the water before them. Though the ocean was about 20 yards away, it was easy to see the waves crashing along the beach, lapping at the sand and continuing to ensure the shoreline remained smooth.

Lapis just smirked, her gaze not leaving the water. "Just relax,  _Peridot_." Lapis was sure to enunciated the name. "Sit back and enjoy the tranquility!" They'd been here for weeks, and Peridot still seemed under the delusion that any day now, she'd be leaving Earth. Lapis knew that it was foolish for Peridot to hope, but she'd thought that eventually Peridot would realize the truth for herself. Was she really so dumb to think that a rescue party was on it's way?

"There is  _nothing_  "tranquil" about Earth." Peridot gritted her teeth.

"This house was a gift from Steven and his friends. The least you could do is pretend to enjoy it." Peridot had done nothing but complain since they'd moved here. She'd had the option of living with the Crystal Gems, finding her own place, or joining Lapis (the same invitation had been extended to Jasper). She'd chosen to bunk with the blue gem. But all her grumbling was starting to grate on Lapis' nerves.

Peridot's hands gripped the porch railing. "Pah, who needs  _friends_?! Those clods won't stand a chance when Yellow Diamond gets here-"

"Yellow Diamond's not coming." Though her face remained pointed towards the sea, Lapis turned her eyes toward Peridot to gauge her reaction. It really shouldn't have taken Lapis saying so to make Peridot realize the truth, but the blue gem couldn't stand to watch someone she considered a friend hold out for a rescue that would never come.

Peridot shot a haughty look at Lapis. If any human had seen her glare, they would have run away in terror. But Lapis wasn't phased by it. She knew that Peridot would never attack her. Not just because she wasn't a fighting gem, but because she knew that she would be no match for Lapis. Lapis had taken on all four of the Crystal Gems at once, while Peridot relied on her ship and Jasper to fight for her. Though she'd never admit it, Peridot was kind of a wimp.

But Peridot wanted to slap that smug smirk right off Lapis' face. "WHAT DO YOU KNOW?!" she spat. "You're always getting yourself captured. A  _child_  had to rescue you from that mirror, and then you went and stupidly went and got yourself captured again by jasper. TWICE!"

"You're right." Lapis said, rolling her eyes. She wasn't pleased that Peridot had brought up her imprisonment, but she wouldn't let on how much thinking about it still hurt, and how difficult it was still getting used to things. It was why she liked living out here. There weren't any humans, or Homeworld Gems, or even Crystal Gems. Well, except Peridot. But Lapis knew that Peridot was just as stranded and scared as she was- even if she wouldn't admit it. "You just know everything, don't you Peridot?" she said, sarcastically. "But Yellow Diamond's still not coming. Not for you, at least." Lapis continued staring out into the ocean. "Why do you think she hasn't answered your distress signal yet?"

"Maybe it didn't reach her! This stupid Earth tech is so archaic!" Peridot slammed a fist against the banister, looking up at the sky in hopes of seeing some sign of deliverance. She'd looked at the sky often, always hoping and always waiting. Yellow Diamond would come for her, Lapis would see! They'd all see!

"Even if the signal didn't reach her, if you were so important, why didn't she send a search party after you? Obviously she's noticed your disappearance by now. And Jasper's too." Lapis spoke matter-of-factly.

Peridot didn't like her know-it-all tone. But as she thought about what Lapis had just said, her face softened, until it had changed from complete anger to utter hopelessness. She gripped the banister on the porch, staring out into the endless sea in the same direction as Lapis. "Y-You-You're right."

In that moment, Peridot finally admitted to herself that she was being foolish. Why should Yellow Diamond come and save her? Why should she waste resources on a puny and insignificant gem like her? There were hundreds more loyal followers ready to do Yellow Diamond's every bidding. The loss of one such as she would be barely noticeable, a flicker on a screen of reports that would simply list her as 'Missing In Action'. How could she have thought for even a moment that in the grand scheme of things, in the vast intricacies of Yellow Diamond's plan, that she mattered?

Peridot turned around, placing her back against a post and sliding down until she was sitting on the wooden porch. She hugged her knees to herself, feeling completely lost and alone. Her great and glorious leader had left her for dead, and now she was stuck on an unfamiliar planet and had been forced to make a truce with her enemies. (At least, if Yellow Diamond ever were to return, Peridot would claim that the truce was compulsory.)

She buried her head in her knees, finally resigning herself to her fate. "I was made to serve Yellow Diamond. It's all I have. All I've ever known." Peridot paused. She could hear the waves crashing along the beach nearby, and felt oddly soothed by them. "What do I do now?" she whispered, half to herself and half to Lapis, if Lapis was even listening.

Lapis walked over and took a seat next to Lapis. "You have me now." Lapis tried to cheer Peri up. But she didn't raise her head, far too absorbed in trying to figure out what kind of future lay in store for her.

They sat in silence for several moments, until Lapis spoke again. "You're homesick, aren't you?" she asked softly. She remembered missing Homeworld when she had first been freed, before she paid it a visit and saw what it had become. Peridot had been there much more recently, so it surely felt a lot more important to her.

After a moment, Peridot's head shot up, turning to the blue gem with terrified eyes. "I'm SCARED Lapis! Okay?! Yellow Diamond is coming to destroy this planet, and I'm stuck here! And the one person I cared about doesn't give a damn about my existence!" Where Peridot had once held hope for rescue, it was now replaced with hopelessness. Stuck on a planet without the technology she was used to, somehow now friends with her enemies, and an unknown demolition date looming.

"I care about you." Lapis said softly, wrapping her arms around Peridot.

Peridot shifted, intending to push Lapis away. No one had ever touched her so closely that didn't mean her harm. Physical affection was unheard of on Homeworld. This was the first time Peridot had ever received a hug, and she didn't understand what it meant, or what she was feeling inside. So she let her body relax in the embrace. After all, what did she have to lose? Lapis squeezed tighter, her face now resting on Peridot's shoulder. It was a comfort that Peridot had never before known, but she had to admit that it actually felt nice.

 _Huh._  Peridot mused.  _Maybe this place isn't so bad after all._


	2. Earth

Getting used to living in such close quarters with another gem had it's challenges. Heck, just getting used to living in a home came with its own discoveries. Homeworld didn't really have houses. There was no useful purpose for them. Gems didn't need to eat or sleep, so they were always working. Now there was time for… leisure. No work _had_ to be done.

Everything was just a little too simple for Peridot's taste. She did her best to busy herself with housework. She found that living next to a beach meant that somehow there was always sand somewhere in the house. So she would take the time to hunt for every single grain and remove it from the premises. Dirt belonged outside. She had a cleaning routine, every day, and when she was bored she would perform it again just to be safe.

The place wasn't very big. It was just enough for the two of them to be comfortable, but not crowded. They didn't need anything extravagant, nor did they want to draw attention to their seaside home if any humans happened to find them. It would have been quiet, too, were it not for the constant crashing waves outside their front door. Not to mention the normal Earth weather, which was always springing up at random and causing an extra ruckus.

For Lapis, just being out of the mirror was enough to make her happy. She could tell Peridot was still upset about being stranded on Earth, so she sometimes flew off for days at a time, giving the green gem her space. Whenever she returned, everything in the house looked exactly the same. Everything had a place. Everything had order. It reminded her too much of Homeworld.

So she would set things askew or "accidentally" create some sort of mess. Peridot would always be frustrated, but Lapis could tell that tidying up was a good distraction from her hopeless plight, even if it did make her fume at the blue gem. Lapis wasn't the best at comfort. Homeworld didn't teach that sort of thing. It taught you to be emotionless and to shut up and do your job. So in her journeys, she was learning to feel and to make her own decisions and to go with her gut.

For awhile, they fell into that routine. Peridot cleaning, and then sitting, and then pacing, and being entirely bored with it all. Her entire life, she'd had purpose, and now… Now she was free to do whatever she wanted. But all she wanted was to go back to Homeworld and serve her Diamond. Unlike Lapis, she didn't want freedom. Not just from the mirror, but freedom to travel and explore and live her life as she pleased. That was not an appealing lifestyle to Peridot.

One day when Lapis returned, Peridot was waiting. How long she'd waited, she didn't know. Time did not matter on Homeworld. There was no day or night. So still, time did not matter to her. The house was perfectly clean as it always was. The beach was free for her to explore, but Peridot had not yet grown comfortable enough with Earth to leave her secluded home.

"Where do you go?" she asked, as soon as Lapis entered the house. She'd been preparing her questions all the while she'd been waiting.

Lapis was surprised at Peridot's sudden curiosity. Even on the days when she was home, the two barely spoke. They both game from Homeworld, true, but they weren't very alike. They would have probably never met if they had both stayed. So finding relatable conversation topics had so far been difficult.

"Wherever I want." Lapis grinned, taking a seat on the couch next to Peridot.

"You don't have a plan?" The green gem responded, incredulous.

"No. I don't need one." Lapis leaned back and folded her arms casually behind her head, closing her eyes.

"But what do you do?" Peridot asked, still confused.

"Whatever I want." That seemed to be her entire answer, and Peridot was trying to figure out how to press more information from her when she continued. "This is a big planet. There's lots to see. Don't you ever wonder what's beyond your own front door?"

Peridot looked toward the mentioned exit to their home, thinking about this question for a moment, before turning back to Lapis. "I have terrain maps downloaded into my systems. I don't have to "wonder." I already know."

Lapis scoffed. "But what about feeling sand beneath your feet? Or the wind on your face? Or standing on a snowy mountain top? Or feeling the bark of a tree? Or smelling all the flowers? There's more to Earth than just _looking_ at it."

"Well, I have enough work right here!" She gestured around the perfectly cleaned and organized residence.

The blue gem rolled her eyes. The place was small and cozy, not big and grand like the buildings of Homeworld, which required several gems to maintain. There was no way it took an efficient gem like Peridot more than a couple of hours to tidy this place up. And if she wasn't home, there couldn't possibly be any messes to clean. So there had to be some other reason that Peridot refused to leave the house.

"Earth scares you, doesn't it?" During her imprisonment in the mirror, Lapis had the ability to observe the events around her, as well as having plenty of time to be alone with her thoughts. She knew a great deal more and was much wiser than she let on. She seemed to have such a carefree nature, but inside she was often thinking very deeply.

Peridot's eyes went wide and she made a shocked noise, almost as if she was offended by the accusation. Lapis, unphased, didn't move from her relaxed position. Peridot knew she'd have to offer a response, and it seemed like her fellow gem was confident in her statement. There was no use trying to come up with an excuse. "Yes. It does. Alright?" she sighed. "This is _nothing_ like Homeworld! Everything is different on Earth. I have all my tech to tell me about the planet, but I was never told how to prepare to be here long term. I don't understand how you can just go out there!" She threw her arms in the air, her mechanical fingers almost leaping off from the force.

Lapis opened her eyes, placing a gentle hand on Peridot's leg. She lowered her arms, looking defeated, staring down at her knees. "Peridot, that's okay. Earth is huge. You don't have to go explore it all at once. But I haven't even seen you leave the porch to walk along the beach. Home's right here, you can see it the whole time. Is it really that scary?"

Peridot's eyes once again moved to the door, a seemingly foreboding piece of the house. "I just want to go home. Do you know what that feels like?"

Lapis remembered speaking the same words to Steven when she was fresh from the mirror. Peridot fit in on Homeworld, she had her place and she liked it there. Lapis was older, a gem made before the war, and she wasn't fond of how Homeworld had developed in the few thousand years she'd been away. Even if she had been able to reintegrate into society, she didn't want to. Peridot still longed to be useful and still trusted her Diamond, to an extent. She would not settle into Earth as easily as Lapis had.

"I do, Peridot." Lapis stared across the room, like she was thinking hard about her memories. "When I finally found freedom, I wanted nothing more than to go home. But I'd been away so long that once I got there, it didn't feel like home anymore. The Earth still doesn't. But at least there are gems here that care about me, and you too. You won't find that on Homeworld. You won't find freedom on Homeworld."

"But I don't _want_ freedom!" Peridot jumped off the couch, balling her fingers into fists. "I want to be where I belong!" she started pacing back and forth across the room, limb enhancers and floating fingers frantically moving around. "Earth is organic. Fragile. Changing. _Chaotic_." she spit out the last word like it was a bad taste in her mouth. "I feel useless. I feel… alone." she stopped, her arms falling to her side defeatedly.

Lapis pondered what to say. There was little comfort that she could offer Peridot. They may have both come from Homeworld, but their lives there had been very different. "I'm sorry I keep leaving. I thought you wanted to be alone. I'll stay, if it would make you feel better."

Peridot turned to Lapis before she responded. "It's not that. Homeworld is a HUGE, bustling planet. Here, everything is so peaceful, and quiet, even when you are around. Even if I'd stayed with Steven, it still wouldn't have felt like home. Homeworld has thousands of gems, all working and moving around. There's always something to do, something each gem should be doing. Here you just… do whatever you want! Nobody tells you what to do!"

"Not all of Earth is peaceful like it is here." Lapis said. She could tell Peridot was frustrated, and getting used to Earth was definitely going to take time. "There are a lot of parts that aren't. Earth is different wherever you go. Nothing is ever the same. Things are always changing, though not always to make this planet better. Humans are funny like that. They do a lot of things that aren't productive."

Peridot still did not look pleased to be stuck on this miserable planet. Lapis continued, "I know it'll be tough to figure out who you are, as an individual. That's… part of what I do when I go out. I find out things about myself. I could help you do that too, if you want. It would beat sitting around this house all day, right?"

The green gem thought about the offer. "I suppose I don't have anything better to do." She joined Lapis on the couch.

"Good." The other gem said with a smile. "Then we can get to know the real Peridot. Together."


	3. War

Peridot, with the aid of Lapis, began exploring the area around the beach house. She had to admit that studying Earth up close was much more effective than simply using her internal computer system. The knowledge would be useless to Homeworld, but if she was going to live on this planet, having as much information as possible could prove important.

She had to admit that her database had not done the planet justice. While there was limited information about the ecosystem, it was completely devoid of knowledge about the food chain of the planet. Such a thing did not exist on Homeworld. Gems did not eat. There were no other species on the planets they controlled.

But Earth seemed to be teaming with life. There were plants, animals, weather, even different terrains. Each served its own purpose. Somehow, despite all its chaos, Earth had managed to survive for thousands of years. Not only that, but it had somehow managed to survive Homeworld's attempt to control it. Of course, the Crystal Gems had something to do with it, but if her knowledge of history served her right, the humans of this world were also present and aided in the war.

Peridot collected several samples to study closer at home. Lapis had no interest in the scientific nature of it all, but she did enjoy keeping the other gem company. She had a little knowledge of the planet from her observations and from her previous visit several thousand years ago, so she did her best to answer Peri's questions.

"So this is water?" She observed, looking out at the crashing waves of the ocean. "This is what you can use your powers on?"

"Sure is." Lapis sat down on the sand and made herself comfortable.

Peridot went back to typing notes into her database. "Steven told me you once controlled the whole thing."

"Sure did." Lapis took in a deep breath of salty air.

The green gem paused, looking down at Lapis and then out to the ocean, thinking about something. "But there isn't water on Homeworld. How were you useful?"

Lapis leaned back and put her arms behind her head, a common position she took when she was trying to relax. She laid down in the sand and closed her eyes, listening to the sounds of the idyllic beach. "Homeworld conquered a lot of planets. Homeworld didn't have a use for water. So what do you think a gem who can control that very substance would be useful for?"

The other gem joined her on the sand, settling down on it as best she could with her limb enhancers. "Removing it?" she ventured a guess.

"That." Lapis nodded. "But first, it was generally useful to terraform the area to suit Homeworld's needs. Creating the best conditions for growing gems and building things. Water is only useful to organic lifeforms."

"But wasn't Homeworld going to start a colony here? Why is there water?" Peridot puzzled over the vast ocean before her. "Using it to Homeworld's advantage and then removing it seems like it would be a logical first step."

"Controlling all the water on the surface of a planet takes a lot of concentration. I wasn't the only lapis lazuli to be sent to Earth. But all the others who came before me disappeared." The blue gem sighed. "Lapis lazuli gems can take on another gem in a fight. But not if they don't know they're coming."

"The rebels captured them, didn't they?" The story was all falling into place for Peridot.

"That's what Homeworld thought. Those other gems were never found. At first they thought the planet might have been more hostile than they'd counted on. So they sent a few soldiers to protect the next lapis lazuli. They were attacked, but their numbers were greater than that of the traitors, and so the rebels escaped and the soldiers reported back to Homeworld."

"How do you know all this?" Peridot interrupted.

Lapis didn't seem phased by the intrusion. "I got a briefing before I was sent to Earth. Plus I asked Pearl and Garnet about their involvement."

So Lapis had been flying off to see the Crystal Gems as well during her travels? Peridot would have said that wasn't fair, but the warp pad leading back to Steven's house was accessible to her at any time, so she really had no one to blame but herself. Perhaps she should follow suit and get more information about the war for Earth, from the point of view of those who had betrayed Homeworld back then.

"The rebels not only kept the lapis lazuli gems from continuing their work, but they also grew in numbers. Homeworld was getting nowhere fast, no matter how many soldiers they sent down. Somehow the gems fighting for Earth kept outmaneuvering and outsmarting Homeworld's own forces." Lapis exhaled, as she her story was getting closer to unpleasant memories. "Eventually, it turned into a war."

Peridot had been busily taking not on Lapis' story. Sure, she knew about the war from the few files she had on hand, but it was only because she had had an assignment to Earth and a brief summary was included in the documents she was given to aid on her mission. Most other gems on Homeworld had never heard of it, unless they had been involved. It was an embarrassment to Homeworld and the Diamonds. Their own kind had not only turned against them en masse, but managed to win an entire planet, a feat that had never been done before, or repeated since. For all the power and efficiency Homeworld and the Diamonds boasted, the loss of Earth was a scourge upon their reputation. It was no surprise they'd tried to keep the events hush hush.

Lapis continued. "The Diamonds tried to jump start the colony and force the rebels out. They thought if they showed how serious they were about conquering it, the rebels might admit defeat and surrender. They were pretty wrong." she smiled at the thought of their defeat. They'd been the ones to put her in the mirror. Homeworld was so disorganized in the fight for Earth that they apparently stopped being able to differentiate between their own forces and the enemies. No wonder they were outsmarted. "Some of the buildings were made, and terraforming was continued, although at a much slower pace. With the war going on, progress wasn't being made fast enough with all the delays the rebels were causing. They started to assign lapis lazuli gems to different parts of the Earth, instead of just having one do all the work. It spread Homeworld's forces thin, and there wasn't enough protection provided for me while I worked."

Peridot didn't need Lapis to tell her what happened next. She'd become trapped in the mirror, her gem had been cracked, and when the war ended she waited for millenniums before she was found by the Crystal Gems. Even then, her freedom did not come until she found her way into the hands of Steven.

"No wonder Homeworld tries to keep the war a secret. Of course, three of them- four, if you count Steven- did manage to destroy my work space in the Prime Kindergarten. That could take weeks to repair, especially since Homeworld's tech was much less advanced when they came to Earth. If the rebels managed to keep creating small problems like that, it would assuredly prevent Homeworld from making progress. It sounds like they weren't interested in the war and were more interested in simply annoying Homeworld until they gave up." Peridot paused, thinking back on Lapis' story. "But where did all the gems who disappeared go? Did they really all join the rebellion?"

Lapis sat up and looked at Peridot. "Homeworld never found out." she said, complete seriousness in her voice.

Peridot looked uncertain, before she ventured, "Do you think they were shattered by the rebels?" She thought about Pearl, Garnet, and even Amethyst. Steven, she knew, had not been involved in the war, unlike his mother. But they had all helped build a home for her on Earth. They'd let her live here, on their planet. All of that, even though she had never pledged her loyalty to their forces.

"Nah, they're all trapped in these weird bubbles in a secret room at Steven's house. The rebels didn't believe in shattering gems. But, if a Homeworld gem didn't want to join their forces, they couldn't just let them run free, either. It was still a war, after all." She stood up, stretching her limbs.

The green gem followed, shaking sand from her limb enhancers. "I guess if they had a soft spot for the Earth, they'd have a soft spot for their fellow gems, too. Even the enemy."

Lapis turned to Peridot. "Where should we explore next?"

Peridot stepped forward, before stopping with a cringe. "I think some of this sand got wedged in my limb enhancers. Why did you have to sit down in such a filthy area?"

"The Earth is covered in dirt, Peridot. Better get used to it." she followed as the green gem headed back toward the house.

"Ugh." she retorted with disgust. Earth would still take some getting used to.


	4. Secrets

The days went by, and the two gem roommates grew closer. Peridot got used to having a few things out of place, as that made Lapis happy. There were certain areas that Peridot was allowed to clean to her heart's content at any time. There were certain areas that Lapis was allowed to leave a mess. Harmony was achieved, and the defensive barriers they had both put up were starting to fade away.

Lapis liked to collect things. Seashells, shiny objects, and oddly, things that were reflective. Peridot liked to study things, which was unsurprising. Sure, collecting data was part of her programming, but she found that curiosity was a natural part of herself as well. The Earth was large and there was much to learn about it. Not to mention that little things were always changing, things that she could observe and study.

But there were other things, more intimate secrets, that started to make themselves known as the pair let their guard down and became more trusting.

They each had their own rooms, and there was a silent agreement that neither should intrude into the space that did not belong to them. They never said anything formal, but they developed a mutual respect of the personal area of the other. They tended to keep their doors shut, although sometimes one would forget and the other would try to sneak a peek. This was especially true of Peridot, who had a naturally curious nature.

Exploring the beach together had become a regular daily habit. Lapis would often get bored and fly off for several minutes or even hours, but Peridot would not usually have gone far by the time she came back. After all, Earth was constantly changing, and so many times the data she'd collected the day before would become invalid or require further study. Slowly but surely, she was expanding her research area around the house. She did find that being outdoors was much less boring than confining herself to their residence.

One day, however, Peridot was unable to locate the blue gem. Lapis had always mentioned when she would be leaving for an extended period, even though as her own free gem she didn't have to inform her roommate. But this time she hadn't. Peridot waited for her to return for hours, even calling for her on the beach and exploring farther than she'd ever gone before. Earth was still new and strange, and it could still hold unknown dangers for the both of them. Though Lapis could hold her own in a fight, she could still be prone to accidents or predators.

Tired from her search, Peridot worriedly returned home. Lapis still hadn't returned there. She thought about seeking the help of the Crystal Gems, and was just about to head to the warp pad when she thought of something. She hadn't thought to check Lapis' living space in the house. Of course, if she was there, she surely would have heard Peridot calling, right? But it was so odd that she hadn't said anything before departing. Perhaps she'd left a clue as to her whereabouts? It couldn't hurt to check, right?

She approached the door, putting her fingers on the knob before pausing to reconsider this action. Instead, Peridot raised her other hand, forming her fingers into a fist and knocking on the wood. "Lapis?" she called. "Lapis Lazuli?" she said, a little louder.

There was still no answer, and still no sign of her elsewhere, so Peridot slowly turned the knob and opened the door. There was still plenty of daylight left, and it shined from the bedroom into the doorway, a bit brighter than it did around the rest of the house. Peridot glanced around the room, her jaw dropping slowly and her eyes going wide as she observed dozens of shining, reflective objects scattered around the room. Most were adorned on the walls, but there were several on the ceiling and a few on the floor, as well as all furniture surfaces containing at least one piece each. They were various sizes, but they all seemed to be from shattered objects, none of them whole.

Amidst all of it was Lapis Lazuli.

Peridot paused, almost closing the door abruptly when she discovered the other gem. But something wasn't right. Lapis offered no response, no indication that she should leave. She didn't even acknowledge Peridot's presence, not even when she ventured to call her name again. The stillness in the room was unsettling.

Lapis was just standing there, staring at a wall of broken pieces of what could have been any combinations of reflective objects. Peridot could not identify all of them, either because the trinket was not available on Homeworld, or because the item was too broken to be recognizable.

"Lapis?" she called again, just to be sure the other gem couldn't hear her. Still nothing. She tentatively took a step inside, still wary of invading the other gem's privacy, but worried by her lack of movement or reaction to her name. This sort of behavior hadn't happened before that Peridot was aware of, and it was very unsettling.

She made her way across the small room until she was standing next to the blue gem. She considered what might be the best way to proceed. She walked all around Lapis, examining her body and gem for any damage. Every appeared normal, except… her eyes. Peridot could see her own reflection in them, the same as she could see her reflection in the many objects scattered around the room. Something was very, very wrong.

Peridot reached out a few tentative fingers, brushing them against Lapis' arm. She took her other hand and wave it in front of her face, but nothing was phasing her. She moved in front of her, trying to look into her eyes but only seeing herself. She grabbed both of her arms, shaking her a bit. "Lapis?" Her movements grew more forceful as nothing happened. "Lapis?!"

"Come on Lapis! This better not be a prank!" Peridot yelled, starting to frantically shake the other gem. This couldn't be happening. She had to be okay! Peridot called her name over and over, her volume rising as the blue gem continued to neither move nor respond. But nothing was working.

Peridot finally let her hands fall to her sides, staring into glasses eyes that gave no indication that Lapis was somewhere inside this body. She glanced around the room, looking for something that might be helpful, but there were just more reflective items as far as she could see. That was what seemed to have caused the problem in the first place, so it wouldn't be of any use.

Then it dawned on her. Peridot started tearing down all the reflections from the wall. At first she just used her fingers, but it was harder to control all ten in an organized manner, so she switched to her levitation beam, which proved much more effective. She wiped the wall clean, letting everything fall to the floor in her haste.

Once it was clear, she surveyed her work, panting from her efforts. She looked to Lapis, hopeful, and was devastated to find no change. Peridot moved to stand in front of her again, but Lapis' eyes still remained glossed over, continuing to hide the gem inside. "WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!" Peridot yelled, frustrated. She was shaking, both from fear and from exerting herself.

The green gem lowered her head. "Come on. Please. You have to come back to me." she stood, quietly staring down at the floor and all the shattered trinkets. She was panicked and numb, out of options and missing the one gem that had been a constant in her journey to make Earth her residence.

She made her way to the blue gem laid solidly in Lapis' back, ghosting over it with her fingers. "I know I haven't said it before, but I need you." she spoke to the gem. "The Crystal Gems, they just don't understand. You and I both come from Homeworld. They didn't want you and they didn't come back for me. We've both been abandoned." Peridot removed her visor with one hand, then let the arm fall limply at her side. "And believe it or not, I like spending time with you. I like being with you here. I don't know if I would have had the courage to explore the Earth without you. I still miss home- _Homeworld_ \- a lot. But Earth, and not just Earth, but here, with you, in this place… it was just starting to feel like home. It can't be home without you." Peridot leaned forward and sighed, letting her own gem rest against that of Lapis Lazuli. " _I_ can't be home without you."

Her gem started to glow, and for a moment she felt like she was falling, sinking, being enveloped into something that wasn't herself. She opened her eyes to find herself lying on the floor, Lapis looming over her. She didn't know how long she'd been out, but she was suddenly aware that her name was being called. "Peridot?" she remembered taking her visor off, and looked around for it. It was laying on the floor, just out of her reach, though she couldn't remember letting it go.

"Peridot?" Lapis said again, kneeling down next to the green gem. "Are you okay?"

"Lapis?" she said groggily, before it finally registered that she was there, actually talking to her now. She gasped, before leaping up and throwing her arms around the other gem, knocking her over. "Lapis! You're-" she looked down at the gem beneath her, realizing quickly how awkward of a position they were in. She clumsily got off, moving to sit on the floor. "You're okay!" Her eyes roved over Lapis, scared to believe it was really her.

"Yeah, it seems that way. What happened?" Lapis observed her living space, which appeared to have gone through some changes recently.

"You don't know?" Peridot asked incredulously.

"I remember we found that tidepool yesterday." Lapis described the events that had happened previously. "You wanted to stay but it was getting dark. You were upset about the solar cycle of the Earth. We came home and you went to analyze and log more data."

"And after that? What happened after that? To you?" Peridot pressed, hoping to find out more about Lapis' unsettling behavior.

The blue gem seemed distant when she spoke, but the fact that she was speaking at all put Peridot at ease. "All these things-" she gestured to the mess of glimmering objects in her room, "-they make me feel safe. I know the mirror was a prison, but it was home for a long time. When I was freed, I thought Homeworld would become my home again. But it didn't. I felt lost. Homeworld was no longer familiar, so I surrounded myself with things that were. My reflection. Reflections of things around me."

"You were just staring at that wall." Peridot pointed. "Well, it was full of those reflective things. You weren't moving. Your eyes they were… they looked… I could see myself in them." The events that had just happened seemed so recent, and yet so far in the past now that Lapis was here and talking with her. "You wouldn't talk to me. I was scared."

"You aren't wearing your visor." Lapis suddenly observed.

"I took it off when I was trying to get your attention." she used her levitation beam to bring it to her fingers so she could return it to her face. "You told me what happened with us yesterday, but not what happened with you."

Lapis looked uncertain, and for a few minutes she didn't answer. She looked around the room once more, as if seeking the answer Peridot asked for, but finding nothing that jogged her memory. "I don't know." she finally sighed. "Maybe a part of me looked at all these reflections and I thought I was trapped in the mirror again. But I can't remember anything. How long was I in here?" she rubbed her head, as if that might somehow help.

"Most of the day. I didn't know where you were. I searched the beach for you. I thought maybe you'd just… left. A part of me was afraid you might be gone for good. I know Steven built this home for us, but, you don't have to stay. You have freedom to go. You have before, for days. If you decided not to come back, or if something happened and you were harmed, I wouldn't know." Peridot laced her floating fingers together, staring down at them.

"Peridot?" The blue gem scooted closer until they were next to each other. "I want to stay. I still like exploring the Earth. But it's more fun when you're with me. I promise, I won't leave you. I could never do that. This is OUR home. Not just yours. Not just mine. But ours. Together. I want things to stay that way. But only if that's what you want too."

"Being with you has made me happier than I ever was on Homeworld. I didn't realize it until we started spending more time together. Now I don't know what I'd do if you disappeared or left. What I'm trying to say is, yes. I do want those things too."

Lapis wrapped an arm around Peridot. "I'm glad. I'm sorry for what happened. I'm sorry I worried you."

Peridot was surprised by the gesture, but she did not find it unpleasant. "I'm relieved you're okay now."

The two sat for several moments in silence, thinking about the things they'd both said. Lapis was the one to finally break the quiet. "Do you still want to go to out?"

"Are you sure you'd be up for that?" Peridot sounded concerned.

"The fresh air will be good for me." Lapis replied.

"Alright. If you're sure." Peridot stood up, offering a hand to Lapis.

The blue gem got to her feet with help from her roommate. "You'll be there if anything happens to me. Right?"

"Always." The green gem replied with a smile.

The two didn't notice as they left the house that they were still holding hands. Even if Earth didn't quite feel like home yet, this little part of it- the part that they shared together- was good enough for now.


	5. Privacy

When they weren't together, Lapis and Peridot tended to keep to themselves. Well, mostly Peridot. She liked to do her research in private. Sometimes she left the door open just a smidge, and Lapis had taken a peek inside now and then. It looked very much like one would expect a laboratory to.

Lapis liked to watch Peridot work when she could, although if Peridot ever noticed her lingering in the doorway, she'd sneak off and pretend like she hadn't been creeping. It seemed like she didn't want to be bothered, so Lapis never asked outright if she could join in on her studies. Plus, she didn't want to seem rude if she got bored and wanted to leave. Some of the things Peridot did were very tedious.

But one day, as she peeked in, she didn't see Peridot at her regular spot at her desk. Usually the two gems would meet up in the morning and decide if they were going out together, or if Peridot was too busy to be bothered that day. Sometimes a project would keep the green gem busy for hours or even days, and as gems didn't need rest, she could always be found in the same place. The other half of the room that Lapis couldn't see was occupied by a bed, a furniture item Steven had insisted on for some reason. Both Lapis and Peridot had one, but they had yet to use them.

Lapis glanced toward the front door, wondering if Peridot had left without her. It wasn't like Peridot to venture out on her own, but perhaps she'd finally gained enough confidence to do so. Not finding her in her regular spot was unexpected, but it still worried Lapis that she hadn't been informed. Sure, her roommate was her own gem and could do what she wanted, but that didn't mean Lapis wasn't concerned for her safety.

She was about to check outside when she heard a loud crash come from Peridot's room. A stream of frustrated grumbles followed, which was Peridot's normal reaction to things not going her way. It happened a lot due to the abundance of Earth inconsistencies that she frequently discovered.

"Peridot? Are you okay?" Lapis pushed open her bedroom door without thinking. It wasn't as if Peridot had never told her to come in. Neither of them had explicitly stated that the other couldn't enter their space, it had just been a general unspoken agreement. Homeworld didn't have a reason for gems to have their own specific rooms, so privacy was basically unheard of.

Lapis expected to see tipped over furniture or broken glass, some kind of mess that peridot had been the accidental creator of. Instead, there was Peridot, sitting on the edge of her bed and reaching for one of her leg enhancers. Lapis had never seen her without them. She'd always thought it was a bit odd that Peridot never took them off, but she attributed it to being a nice reminder of Homeworld.

But as she looked from the leg on the floor to Peridot, she realized that at the end of her leg was just a stump. Well, it wasn't even a full leg. The other half, below the knee, Lapis quickly realized, was made up for by her limb enhancer. All three of her other enhancers were on, but the blue gem could only assume that the rest of her appendages looked similar.

As her fingers fumbled for the enhancer on the floor, Peridot looked up with wide eyes to see Lapis in the doorway. For a brief moment, neither of them said anything, before Peridot yelled, "GET OUT!" She used the beam in her arm to slam the door shut, almost catching Lapis' hand between it and the doorframe as she did so.

Lapis just stood outside the door, shocked. She hadn't expected Peridot to be missing a part of her body- probably multiple parts. She also hadn't expected the green gem to react so strongly. Why did Peridot feel that this was something she needed to hide? Was she formed like that on Homeworld? Gems were supposed to be perfect, and useful, and anyone who wasn't was simply crushed immediately. Were all Peridots made this way now? Lapis had too many questions swimming in her mind.

"Peridot?" she called out through the door. Inside, she could still hear scuffling. "Peridot, I'm sorry." She laid her forehead against the wood and waited for several moments, but there was no response. She slammed a frustrated fist against the door, the slamming sound being far louder than she anticipated. "I'm really sorry." she tried again. "I didn't meant to intrude. This doesn't change anything. I'm still your friend. I still care about you."

She sighed and abandoned her post at the door to settle down on the couch. Peridot had to come out sometime, right? She couldn't just live in her room forever. Well, she could, but Lapis suspected that she wouldn't. Once she'd given Earth a chance, she'd found it fascinating, and Lapis couldn't imagine that she'd lock herself away from all the discoveries available on this planet. Especially if it was over something so minor as Lapis seeing her without a limb enhancer.

Her theory proved to be correct. Awhile later, Peridot emerged. She immediately noticed Lapis on the couch, and hesitated in the doorway, before she came to join the blue gem where she was seated. She stared at her knees, and in turn, Lapis examined hers. The two were quiet, unsure who should speak first.

It was Peridot who broke the silence. "Perhaps I should not have reacted to harshly." she took in a deep breath. "I, too, apologize."

"It's okay. I'm sorry I barged in. I just got worried about you." she paused. "You know, you can tell me about these things. I don't know why you'd be afraid to. Maybe I haven't taken enough of an interest in you before. But I really care about you. If there's ever anything you want to know about me, you can just ask. I don't think either of us is really that great at this whole talking thing. Homeworld doesn't exactly foster bonding among gems. And I didn't exactly have anyone to talk to for about 4,000 years. I know things take time and maybe you're not ready. But I'll be here to listen when you are."

Peridot continued to stare downward, processing what her friend had said. "Homeworld doesn't exactly foster trust, either. I should learn to do that. To trust you. We're going to be here for awhile, after all."

Lapis grinned at that, and scooted over so she and Peridot were flush together. Quiet persisted between the two again, until Lapis spoke. "Were you born with- without..." she wasn't sure how to ask the mound of question that were running through her head.

"I don't want to talk about it. Yet. It's complicated." Peridot ran a few fingers through her hair.

The blue gem pursed her lips, dissatisfied with the lack of an answer but still wanting to be respectful of her roommate. "Okay. Do you still want to go out today?"

"I would like that, yes." she stood, and headed for the front door. Lapis followed after, and they resumed their almost daily ritual once again.


	6. Reality

Peridot walked from her room, letting out a low moan, and rubbing at her gem. It was an action Lapis had seen her do many times before, but one she hadn't bothered to question it. But she figured, if they were going to be in close proximity long term, she may as well find out what it was all about.

"What's wrong?" Lapis asked, as if this was the first time she'd noticed Peridot's odd habit.

"My gem just hurts." Peridot said, as if this was an annoyance she was used to.

"Is it damaged?" Lapis asked, looking concerned. She couldn't think of any activity that would have caused Peridot to crack her gem, but she couldn't think of any other reason why a gem should hurt.

"No. It just-" she rubbed at it some more, grunting as she tried to stifle the pain. "Argh!" she stomped about the house, irritated.

Lapis pondered how she could help. "Say, Peri?"

"WHAT?!" she shrieked, not caring if she hurt Lapis' feelings. The throbbing of her gem was irritating, like a human bug bite might be. Only Peridot's gem was larger than a simple insect mark, and it wouldn't go away over time.

"Go sit down." Lapis said calmly, ignoring Peridot's attitude. She went to the only sink in the house, turning it on for a few moments and forming an orb of water from the flowing liquid. She and Peri hadn't seen the point of having plumbing, but Steven had insisted it was necessary. Something about sleepovers and vacations. She could have just as easily grabbed water from the ocean, but thought that perhaps salt water was not the best solution to this problem.

Peridot stomped over and sat on the couch, continuing to rub at her aching gem. All the while she grumbled, but her complaints were suddenly silenced when Lapis placed the water bubble around her forehead. "Wha-" She instantly relaxed, her gem soothed for the first time in her life.

"Better?" Lapis grinned, taking a seat next to her.

"Y-Yeah." Peridot breathed. "That's- woah." Her whole body started to relax, melting into the couch as she breathed a sigh of relief.

"Do you know why it hurts?" Gems didn't normally feel pain. Though their bodies could be damaged and force them to retreat, anything done to their physical manifestation wasn't much of a bother. Gems could be cracked, too, but it wasn't so much painful as it was incapacitating.

"Yes." Peridot said simply, closing her eyes.

Lapis waited for several moments before realizing that Peridot was not going to explain more without provocation. "Why?" she asked curiously.

Peridot's eyes shot open, and she looked wide eyed at Lapis. She couldn't decide if Lapis was being rude by asking, since she knew that Lapis was only asking out of concern for her well-being. Yet, no one had ever _cared_ to ask if or why she was in pain. Peridot found herself at a loss for words, debating whether or not to share this vulnerable piece of her history. Then again, it was just the two of them, out here, alone, and with Yellow Diamond coming they probably wouldn't survive much longer anyway. What did she have to lose?

"Thanks. For helping out with my gem." She pointed at the water bubble. "So, you really want to know why my gem hurts?"

"Of course! That's why I asked, silly." Lapis smiled, the same way she always smiled. It was a smile that conveyed how glad she was, not just to be here with Peri, but because she was finally free. Free from the mirror, from Homeworld, from any imprisonment. Every day she treasured that.

"It started when I failed a previous mission." Peridot stared up at the ceiling as she recalled the tale. "I ended up becoming injured and retreating into my gem. I made a stupid mistake!" she balled her floating fingers into fists as she remembered the blunder that had caused her current state. "My mission comrades brought my gem back to Yellow Diamond. She... was not pleased." Peridot turned her eyes to Lapis. "Are you sure you want to hear this?"

"Only if you're okay telling me." Lapis reached out a hand to squeeze five of Peri's floating fingers.

Peridot squeezed back, then continued. "My gem... was reformed. It was sanded down to the shape and size it is now, as punishment for failure. I didn't always look... like this." she gestured to herself. Her story wasn't pretty, and she was scared of driving Lapis away now that she knew about her deformities.

Lapis remained silent. She'd been to Homeworld. She'd seen all the new technology there, all the new kinds of gems that had been created. But she never would have suspected that Homeworld was capable of such horrors as Peridot was now describing.

Peridot decided to just spill the whole story. "When I tried to regenerate, I couldn't recreate my normal body. And my gem still hurts, a lot. Often." She reached up to touch it, forgetting the water bubble was there until her fingers slipped into it. She quickly pulled them back, shaking off the moisture. "So now you know." she said, turning to look at Lapis since she was still quiet.

Neither of them spoke for a few minutes. Peridot was waiting for a reaction from Lapis, but Lapis was too shocked at what Peridot has just revealed to say anything. Her mouth kept opening and closing, as if she wanted to form words, but was unable to produce any sounds.

Finally, her mind registered the silence that was lingering between them. Lapis tries to speak, but her voice came out in a whisper. "So that's why..." she trailed off, recalling the one time she had seen Peridot without one of her enhancers on. She'd been longing to ask about it since then, but Peridot had been so defensive, Lapis had been afraid to.

Lapis knew from her time in the mirror what it was like to be unable to regenerate. But Peridot had been permanently damaged, never able to recreate her limbs fully again. "How could they do that?" Her voice was so low, Peridot almost missed her question. Lapis was in so much shock that she could barely form the question, but she managed to push it from her lips.

Peridot just shrugged. "I failed one too many times. It was… what I deserved." she paused. "A constant reminder that I only exist because Yellow Diamond wishes it. She didn't have to be merciful. She could have ordered my gem be smashed, my existence snuffed out. I would have deserved that, too."

"Peri, don't say that!" Lapis burst out. "Yellow Diamond can't just control lives like that! It's not fair-"

"Lapis, it's fine. I'm fine." Peridot said calmly. She ran her fingers through her hair, her gaze moving to the ceiling again. She missed Homeworld, she missed serving Yellow Diamond, she missed having a purpose. The lazy days spent with Lapis were nice, she supposed, but they were not productive. She sighed, lost in her own thoughts.

Lapis desperately wanted to say more, to convince Peridot that she was worth more than Yellow Diamond had led her to believe. But she knew that Peri had been on Homeworld for far too long. She'd been conditioned to follow orders, to take punishment without complaint. Here on Earth, she was free, but Peridot still seemed to long for Homeworld, with all its unjust rules and punishments. Lapis couldn't understand her reasoning, but perhaps she would once she got to know her.

For now, Lapis was content to live here, with Peridot, in their secluded hideaway. No humans and no gems bothered them out here. They were free to live as they pleased, and make their own choices. No one controlled them or held them captive. Though Peridot acted as though she were still under the command of Homeworld, hopefully she would come to accept her freedom, and be able to make decisions for herself.

Lapis leaned over and placed a peck on Peridot's cheek. Peridot seemed to be startled out of her thoughts, and turned to look quizzically at Lapis, rubbing her cheek as she did so. Lapis just grinned back, amused by her own antics.

And then, Peridot smiled back. It was perhaps the first genuine smile that Lapis could ever recall seeing from her. The realization made her grin wider, and a soft, bubbly giggle escaped her lips. She gripped Peridot's hand in her own, suddenly growing somber as she said, "No matter what Homeworld says, you matter more than you think."

**Author's Note:**

> Lapis and Peridot live a domestic lifestyle on a beach together. It's near one of the warp pad locations, so Steven is able to visit and vice versa. The Crystal Gems, including Steven, helped them build a shack on the beach, where they now live together. Jasper lives in Steven's home, helping the Crystal Gems fight monsters. Peridot is not a battling gem, and Lapis is tired of fighting anything or anyone. So they've decided to live peaceful lives together, secluded from humans and the CG's.
> 
> If you like my work, please consider buying me a coffee! https://ko-fi.com/gemology


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